I Fear For The Future!

Okay, maybe the title is a TAD dramatic but you'll understand what I mean in a minute.

I just got through flipping through the latest Shop Til You Drop magazine that I picked up with the groceries this evening.  Now, it's not a high fashion magazine but it's usually a good one to look through to get a run down of current trends, places to look for neat bits and pieces, how to put certain outfits together and sometimes a different point of view on the fashion industry.  It's an overall okay mag for someone with a limited amount of time.

So, I decided to give the current one a quick flip through, to see what catches my eye in case I want a new outfit for the upcoming Christmas parties, or just because, and was horrified by what I found.  Yes, horrified, terrified and wanting to stick my head under a pillow and forget...pretend it was all a bad dream.

I weep for anyone trying to buy clothes for the next season, for those that decide they love the new trends and hop on board this particular fashion train because it's really nothing but the worst kind of TRAIN WRECK.  The styles are pulling up some of the WORST trends of the 80's and combining them with the most ludicrous colors and stylings.  The only people who MIGHT (and that is a big maybe) be able to pull these looks off are stick thin Glamazons with more money than Gates and who probably belong on the catwalks themselves.

I mean, seriously?  Poofy but structured Tulip skirts (which we all know were really a bubble skirt in it's past life) and floppy wannabe blazers with scalloped edges?  The ruffle trend could be fun if done right but most of the dresses I saw had strategically places ruffles intended to draw the eye to the parts of the body most normally built females would really prefer to pretend don't exist.  And high waisted short shorts?  Did somebody forget that shorts aren't the most flattering garements to begin with?  Pulling the waist up to your bra strap and cutting the legs off at your groin REALLY isn't going to help any. *headdesk*

I have a funny feeling I'm going to be relying on my in-closet staples spread out with very selective online purchases from places where sanity still reigns and combining that with garments coming from my very own sewing machine.  You know, ones that fit and flatter me rather than make me look like a balloon float that got lost on it's way to the Macy's Parade. *rolls eyes*

Oh yes, and then there is the final thing.  You know how 'they' like to say Green is the new Black and all that crud?  The color of the season, for both garments and  makeup...is orange.  Ranging from peach to pumpkin, it's the trendy color.  And it makes my want to vomit.  One of the hardest colors to match to most people, it's also just plain hideous under normal circumstances unless you're going to a Halloween party.  Does that sound a bit too narky? I know I really hate the color, personally, but come on!  It's ORANGE!  McDonald's uses orange in everything they make because it's supposedly the most psychologically neutral color and one that spans all socio-economic groups.  It does that because everyone agrees it's a gross color!!

Alright, rant over.  I'm going to go through my fabric and pattern stashes and decide what I'M going to be wearing for the next 6 months because I get the feeling that I really won't be buying anything new anytime soon.

X-posting to LJ